Scientists confirm Federer is not human

AN international conference of zoologists and biologists has declared that Swiss tennis player Roger Federer is not human.

After exhaustive tests, the scientists concluded he is definitely GOAT.

Conference chairman Dr Ty Brayker told journalists that it was clear Mr Federer had morphed into something ‘beyond human’.

“We’ve tested DNA from his sweatbands for the past 20 years and it’s now conclusive he has all the qualities of the GOAT.”

Dr Brayker said ironically the goat (capra aegagrus) was a much-revered animal in Switzerland celebrated for its tenacity, ability to thrive in adverse situations, and uncanny sense of balance.

“Let me be clear; Mr Federer is the GOAT, not a goat.

“It’s not the first time we have found this in high-performing humans. Lance Armstrong was also thought to be GOAT, but was in fact an ASS (asinus).”

Asked if he was fan of Mr Federer, Dr Brayker smiled and replied: “I have no scientific evidence, but without a doubt he is the Greatest-Of-All-Time.”